Google-i-cious - The Dancing HousewifeThe Dancing Housewife

Originally published on 9/30/2010

Michael Bolton, one of the few legitimate stars in the celebrity cast of Dancing with the Stars this season, was eliminated this week. Okay, so he’s no Baryshnikov, but Bruno didn’t need to be so catty either. At least Bolton’s a real honest to goodness star, a talented singer, songwriter and musician.

I was sorry to see him go for that reason alone. I really don’t have a problem with the smattering of “stars-once-removed” who contend for the mirrored disco ball trophy each season. Folks like Laila Ali, Heather Mills (the ex Mrs. McCartney), and Bristol Palin simply do not bother me for some reason. My pet peeve is that regular ordinary people who have not an ounce of talent (like yours truly) get to be on the show (and I don’t).

The name of the show is DANCING WITH THE STARS not DANCING WITH THE ORDINARY PEOPLE WHO HAVE NOT AN OUNCE OF TALENT! I mean, come on! If you’re going to let one regular Joe chasse’ around the dance floor, you’ve got to let the rest of us have a go at it.

Nowadays reality television and YouTube make it easy for every Tom, Dick, and Harry to become famous. It’s the only viable explanation for how hoards of common folks (Kate Gosselin and Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino to name a few) are becoming common household names. Kate Plus Eight, Jerseyshore, The Real Housewives of Atlanta…I am a real housewife of Atlanta – AN AUTHENTIC REAL HOUSEWIFE OF ATLANTA – and you don’t see me being catapulted into viral fame. If there ever was a regular person who deserved a shot a chasing that coveted mirror ball trophy, it would be me!

I AM GOOGLE-I-CIOUS!

Image credite: Jim Spellos www.imagethink.com

That’s right. You heard me. Go ahead. Google IYCSSN Rule and see what happens. That’s right, Mr. ABC Television Executive; ANTOINETTE DATOC is smack at the top of the list of results. So there, I’m creating a brand here, but has anybody from Dancing with the Stars called? Nooooo. And while I’m blowing off steam I don’t care what anybody says, Bruno needs to get some manners. He was very rude to Michael Bolton on Monday night. Constructive criticism aside, didn’t his mother ever teach him: if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything.