If the following post seems familiar, it’s because I began publishing it on Valentine’s Day in 2013 as a letter to my sons, but really it’s an open letter to all men. At the time, neither of my sons had girlfriends so I’m certain they rolled their eyes when I forced them to read it and immediately dismissed the advice as ridiculous. Still, I’m glad I imparted it. Fast forward a decade. Both of my sons are engaged to be married this year and have turned out to be real men who do romance…I like to think I had something to do with it. To my awesome future daughters-in-law, you’re welcome. Happy Valentine’s Day, 2023!
Dear Christian and Jared,
Today is Valentine’s Day so it seems a good day to remind you there’s something to be said for good, old-fashioned, romantic rituals. Even though you probably think Valentine’s Day is mostly a money gauging Hallmark-led conspiracy, rest assured girls still like it. And by the way, did you know Valentine’s Day was first linked to romantic love in the mid-14th century before Hallmark even existed? It was a time when courtly love flourished and a gentleman was expected to be noble and chivalrous in expressing his love and admiration for a lady. Sadly, good, old-fashioned romance has fallen out of style these days.
Image credit: http://twtrland.com
Maybe guys your age think it’s archaic, hokey and unmanly to be romantic, but it’s my guess you’re simply confused by radical liberal feminist propaganda. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. While modern women (myself included) expect equal pay for equal work, are independent and make it clear we are fully capable of taking care of ourselves, deep down (even if we don’t admit it) we LOVE to be courted. Yes I said courted, as in swept-off-our-feet-weak-in-the-knees-hearts-all-a-flutter courted. We are suckers for the guy who brings us flowers, sings us love songs, takes us on real dates, opens doors, offers his coat, kills the spiders, turns off the phone and we are REAL suckers for VALENTINE’S DAY.
Christian and Jared, my hope for you is this. Someday when you find the girl who captures your heart, you will take the time to acknowledge your love with good, old-fashioned romantic rituals. My hope is you will do it on Valentine’s Day… and every day.
Now. In the meantime, since neither one of you has a sweetheart (or is willing to admit to having one) I’d like to remind you it’s been more than a decade since either of you has given me one of those red hearts, made out of construction paper and glued to a white paper doily. The way I see it, until you find that special someone, there is absolutely nothing creepy about your making Valentine’s Day all about me. It’s a little late and all the good cards are probably gone so a poem is fine. No need to call… text or email works.
Love,
Momma